my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
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