Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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