She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize
