their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
