there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
