that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
How does it feel to date your dad?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
