Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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