I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I love you. Go after that dick
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
