so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize