and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
