but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
You ate ashes out of my bong
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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