I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
