Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
