I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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