we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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