you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
