We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Who died my cat blue again?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
