Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
