thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
