What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
high people should be assigned attendants
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
