the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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