You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Randomize
