We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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