So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
