So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
