I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
