That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
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