I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
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