help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
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