Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
