OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
