The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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