What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
