Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
