Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
