It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize