Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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