What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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