hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize