Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
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