Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
COCAINE IS GR8
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
