why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
