He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
you made out with another girl for some wings
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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