Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize