Well apparently he's into motor boating.
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
