ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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