when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Randomize
