Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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