he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I met the friendliest cop last night
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
