Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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