What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
people are starting to question the shark bite story
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
