Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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